How to have an adults-only wedding! So pretty much no matter who the couple is... SOMEONE they know has children. Many weddings are formal, adults-only functions, and many of our clients find it difficult to explain to their parent-friends, or even family members with kiddos. You may love your nieces dearly, but not necessarily want them jumping around on the dance floor with your happily drunken college roommates. Here are some tips for dis-inviting the kids without alienating the parents!
- Check in Early! Let them know ahead of time so they're not scrambling the week of for a sitter.
- Try to use language on the save-the-date and invitation that says that the kids aren't invited.
- It's OK to give them a call and let them know! Call ahead if you have parent friends... let them know you'll have a babysitter, or they should get one.
- There are really affordable wedding babysitting services that will watch a number of kids in a hotel room for a reasonable fee. Great investment! You get a kid-free wedding and the parents get a night off!
- Address your RSVP for # guests, So: Smith Party of 2 (not including the 6 kids so you don't get an RSVP back for 8 people)!
- "Adults Only Reception" is a great way to indicate without saying "no kids" (positive language rather than negative...) without offending.
- "Black Tie Attire" - Most parents wouldn't bring kids to a black tie charity event. This is a subtle hint that kids aren't really welcome...
- "Oh, no! I forgot to mention it! Now what do I do?!"
- So... it's weeks before your wedding, and people are RSVP'ing with their kids. What do you do? Our recommendation is hire a sitter, put them in a close-by hotel room, or a separate room at your venue... and have the kids be out-of-sight.
- We'd call the guests individually, and let them know the sitter option is there, and ask them to RSVP for the sitter situation, so you know how many kids to hire a sitter service for. Usually sitters manage 3-5 kids per sitter. If you have more, they typically send more than one person.
- Alternatively, you can reach out and let your guests know their kids won't be welcome, and give a list of sitters (your planner can get you a list of local sitters!). This is harder, and you'll likely lose guests to the wedding this way...
- A major challenge is out-of-state guests for destination weddings (we get a TON of these in Colorado)! Our recommendation is the above sitter situation. You can also tell the parents you'll get the room, and they can hire the sitters among themselves (this makes some parents feel better, as they're sitter-picky).
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